I've taken to deliberately putting myself in situations which should hurt me, just to see if I feel anything.

I don't. No tears, nothing. Just a hollowness.

I just do not feel anything, at all.

If I look in the mirror, there is no expression on my face.

I don't know what it is. I welcome the numbness, though.

If this doesn't hurt, nothing can. Nothing will get to me, or hurt me. Nothing will get through these walls. Nothing will ever cause me pain again.

If I try to remember what it used to feel like, nothing comes to me. It feels like everything's always been blank in me. I can think about everything for hours. Days even. And it won't bother me.

It's like I'm what you remember me as just so you won't worry about me.

Please don't, I'm fine.